Week Ending 9/28

 Hey, it's me...

Feeling better today than I did this time last week, though not a whole lot... It been an up and down week. 

I got a lot of writing done on Wyrd Tales. I'm very near the end of writing my current story that brings with it a drive to finish. I'm about 6 chapters ahead of what's published and maybe 2-3 chapters from the end. So, that's good...

On the down side, I've been having a lot of brain fog and I've been crashing hard. It's frustrating, especially having something I really want to do and not being able to do it.

In other news, we've been experimenting with artificial sweeteners, so I can have a little something sweet from time to time. We discovered monk fruit, which is pretty good. Juno was able to make a cheesecake with it that tasted very much like my old cheesecake. It was terrific to have it again. 

Of course, there's a downside. It's that kind of week. Turns out this brand of monk fruit is mixed with something called erythritol, a sugar alcohol, which is fine expect that in some people (me) and in large enough quantities (like lots of cheesecake over the course of a week) it can cause some pretty nasty abdominal pain. Yesterday wasn't great. At the same time, once it wasn't horrible. I mean, yeah, I was in a lot of pain but I knew why and I knew I would get over it. So, despite the pain, I was actually feel pretty positive about life... which I haven't been for a while.

Honestly, I've been feeling really down lately. I'm just trying to keep going.

Onward

Week Ending 9/21

 Hey, it's me...

I feel terrible today.

Pretty good week, actually, but I've been having trouble sleeping. It finally caught up with me today. So, I'm resting. More later. 

Tomorrow will a better day.

Onward

Week Ending 9/14

Hey, it's me... 

So, I don't talk a lot about current events, but this week is something mom and I would have talked about. 

I could say a lot of things but after thinking about it, what I want to say is this - empathy is important and violence isn't the answer. Life isn't a video game and we can't just kill the bad guys.

I keep remembering a scene from 12 Angry Men... 

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mild spoilers 

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Toward the end of the movie, a racist juror goes off on an angry, racist rant. One by one, all the other jurors, even the ones who sided with him on the case, stand up and turn their backs on him. No one says a word. No one gets angry. They just stand up and turn away, until the racist realizes he's alone... no one agrees with him, no one will even listen to him. Finally, he just sinks down into his chair and goes silent. One by one, the jurors take their seats again and carry on, almost... but not quite... as if he had never spoken. Because they remember what he said, and they remember that they all rejected it.

.

end spoilers

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We did that once, as a society. We made being a racist, misogynistic, bigoted jerk socially unacceptable. We stood up, turned our backs and refused to listen. We set about building a better world instead. 

Now, the racist, misogynistic, bigoted jerks have forced their way back. They demand our attention. They are working to tear down our better world. 

We don't have to let them.

We can each work to make our corner of the world a fairer, kinder, and more loving place. We can refuse to let them shape who we are. We can continue to build our better world. 

Onward

Week Ending 9/7

Hey, it's me...

So, after kind of a rough week, I finally realized that I just wasn't giving myself enough grace to recover from last week, which was really, really draining. 

It's dumb, because intellectually I know that I need to give myself time to recover but in reality I just keep pushing and end up driving myself into the ground. 

So, yeah, I finally decided to let myself rest and feel hugely better for it.

Another downside, I didn't have a chance to watch another movie with D this week. Though he did say he watched Kpop Demon Hunters on his own and really enjoyed it, so that's something. 

We'll see if we can do better next week. 

Onward

Week Ending 8/31

 Hey, it's me...

Well, that was another very busy week. I need to remember to avoid doing two of those in a row if at all possible.

I had an appointment with my new doctor. I think I mentioned that my doctor, who I love, is retiring. Well, she recommended a fellow to be her replacement. I saw him this week... but first I had to go to my doctors office and sign paperwork to get my records transferred to his office (which they weren't). I also got a copy of my records for myself, which I'm glad of. (Important note readers - you have an absolute right to copies of your medical records. Never let a doctors office say they won't give them to you. There are only eight legal reasons they can refuse and they are very limited circumstances.)

See the new doctor was... OK. I'm not sure about him, but he wasn't horrible. He just didn't seem interested. We'll see how it goes.

The down side of course is, between a trip to the old doctors for paperwork and a new patient appointment with the new doctor the next day, I was pretty wrecked for the rest of the week. I'm still pretty much wrecked honestly. 

In other news, I finally showed D Casablanca. He said afterward that he hadn't been sure about it until the end... and now he wants a copy for himself so he can watch it several more times to catch all the little details he's sure he missed. Also, he laughed at all the funny parts. We'll make a classic movie fan out of him yet. :) 

So, good week but a busy and exhausting week.

I really need a week to just rest. (touch wood)

Onward

Week Ending 8/24

 Hey, it's me...

Kind of a busy week.

I'm still working on getting back into the habit of doing the chair yoga, but it feels good even with only doing it every couple of days. So, that's good.

I had an appointment with a new counselor. I made it because I really felt that I needed to talk to someone. Later, as I was thinking about what I wanted to work on I realized that, no... I just want someone to talk to. I don't need a counselor. I need a friend. Also, the appointment did not go well. It was one of the few times I left a counseling session more stressed out than I was when I started. So, not doing that again. I just need to find some old friends I can reach out to when I need to chat. 

In other news, I've made a personal commitment to introduce D to some classic cinema and he's agreed. This week we watched 12 Angry Men (1957) and The Day the Earth Stood Still (1951). D really enjoyed 12 Angry Men. I had forgotten how powerful that movie really is, while being really very simple.

That's about it, really. 

A busy week, but a good one.

Onward 

Week Ending 8/17

 Hey, it's me...

Well, no new movies this week but some other stuff. Actually, it's been a kind of intense week. I've been doing more of the chair yoga, which feels good. I decided to get proactive and reached out to a potential new doctor (my current doctor is retiring, which I am very unhappy about because I like me doctor). All in all, I got a real rush of energy one day this week (I think it was Thursday) and did a whole lot.

Unfortunately, the downside of getting a rush of energy is spending the next two days almost completely incapacitated. I have clearly lost the habit of a) stopping before I hit the wall and b) accepting the days when I need to rest. I need to get back into that habit. On the plus side, now that I recognize that hopefully it should be easier to do. 

Well, that's it for me this week.

Onward