Mom

 We really won't have gone through all of this if not for mom.

I've mentioned before, my mom has cancer. Technically, I think it's her third cancer (though based on the genetic testing they did it appears to be the same cancer... it's just spread). This time it can't be gotten at through surgery. She tried chemo and ended up in the hospital with a horrible reaction. We had a long talk with her doctor (I was on conference call) and discussed options. Strangely it wasn't a hard decision in the end. Quality of life is more important than quantity. She really can't do the chemo and have any kind of quality of life.

So, she'd not going to do the chemo. Which means, eventually, this cancer is what will end my mom's life.

One of the reasons we went to Vermont, the big reason, was to see my mom. Maybe for the last time, face to face. That adds a melancholy tone the whole thing. 

Now, the paradox of this is, she actually feels really good right now. She's not dying tomorrow or next week. She's a bit more tired than usual and, thanks to the first round of chemo, all her hair has fallen out... but she's happy and she's still very much my mom. 

I got this great picture of her and D our first day visiting her. That really sums it up.

We got spend a couple of days with her. D even spent one night at her place, and they got to hand out and watch movies together.

I also got to meet with, and talk to, the Home Hospice people who will be looking after her. They seem like good folks. I think she'll be in good hands. Again, it was weird because we were talking about all this end-of-life stuff... but she's just smiling and happy and doing well.

So, it was (and is) melancholy but still, she makes me smile.

I love my mom.