Week Ending 6/30

 So, let's start with the good news - mom's home from the hospital, after a brief stint in a care facility to make sure she was physically able to handle basic things. So, that's a sigh of relief.

Though honestly, I be more relieved if this whole "mom's in the hospital" excitement hadn't been a reaction to the bloody treatment. The stupid cancer is still there. Still, the good news is, she doesn't have to do that kind of chemo again. There are alternatives... and she's my mom. She won't do anything until the blessed doctor (who is on vacation... again) sits down an explains those alternatives to her satisfaction. 

What did you expect? I didn't spring full grown from the head of Zeus, you know. :)

How am I doing?

I'm not great. I'm tired. I'm worried about mom, which makes me more tired (and no, mom... I know you're reading this...  that isn't your fault and you're not going to hold things back 'to protect me' because that won't actually make me worry any less). 

I just need to rest, work on relaxing a bit and give some energy to fun stuff like my Sims stories (Raven's Apprentice is fully written and the last chapters will be going up throughout July... need to figure out my next story soon) and my painting and minis (I've got ten marsh cultists I need to finish so I can put them away... great looking models but hell to paint... and then ten snake cultists I'm actually looking forward to working on).

Also, Juno found the complete DVD collection of Foyle's War at a rummage sale, so I'm going to watch that.

So...

Onward

Week Ending 6/23

If last week was a roller coaster, this week was a crash straight into the blacker pits of nightmare.

The chemo finally caught up with mom. She had a very, very bad reaction, ended up in the ER and has spent this whole week in the hospital. I've talked to her a few times, and she sounds exhausted and upset. It doesn't help that she has to fight with the hospital at every step to make sure she gets the care she needs.

Sadly, I'm also 1000 miles away and helpless to do anything, other than provide moral support on the phone and file the occasional complaint and/or appeal with the government. I guess that's helped.

So, how am I? Angry. Afraid. Exhausted. Health wise, good days and bad days continue to march on in their relentless manner.

At one point this week, we were all very afraid for mom. It seemed like she was ready to give up. D was upset and not sure what to do with himself. I said to him - read a good book, watch a good movie, eat good food, love each other... because that's what mom values.

So that's my plan and that's what I ask of all of you. Please, for my mom, in this coming week - 

Read a good book. 

Watch a good movie (or TV show). 

Eat good food. 

Love each other. 

Onward

Week Ending 6/16

Happy Father's Day, to those who celebrate.

My guys got me presents and Juno made me a nice breakfast, so that was really cool.

The rest of the week has been kind of a rollercoaster. This week saw my mom's first chemo treatment. She tells me that the treatment itself went pretty well. Also, the treatment room has a great view of a garden they put in between various buildings. 

The hospital she goes to is this old accumulation of buildings built over decades, if not a century or more, that overlap in odd and wonderful ways. I've tried wandering around in it and "maze" doesn't do it justice... you can pass through three buildings, some of them more than once, walking down a single hallway. Anyway, there's a spot where the buildings didn't overlap, creating this enclosed but open space and they put in a garden in there. The chemo infusion room has windows looking out onto it. She sent me pictures.

So, the treatment was OK but the days after have been rough for her. Good thoughts, positive energy and prayers are all warmly welcomed. 

Anyway, I'm stressed out about how she's doing and will be, no matter how much she tells me not to. :)

The rest of my week... I've been pushing myself too hard trying to distract myself from being stressed. So, that doesn't work. 

Ah well, we do what we can.

Seriously - send good thoughts, positive energy and prayers, please.

Onward.

Week Ending 6/9

 Another week.

I haven't been feeling well. Tired and overdoing it... burning the candle at both ends and I don't have much candle to begin with. 

I did, however, get a ton of writing done on my Raven's Apprentice story. Still publishing it slowly to my story blog (You'll find it under my user profile if you're interested. I know you're not, and shame on you :) ). Last week I'd been worried that, if I published new chapters twice a week I'd burn through my backlog and wouldn't have enough stuff done to keep up. Now, I've actually finished the story and given myself enough backlog to last until mid-July, even with publishing twice a week. It was fun but probably didn't help with the whole 'tired and overdoing it' element of things.

Mom starts chemo next week. Good will, positive thoughts and prayers are all welcomed.

Onward

Week Ending 6/2

Well, this has been a very interesting week.

Juno had her HAPS conference and so, for most of the week, she was away. That meant it was just D and me around the house. 

We actually did quite well. Juno left me with plenty of leftovers and supplies, so there wasn't any worry about having enough to eat. D has a different enough schedule from me that I mostly had the place to myself. In a weird way, it was a vacation. I didn't have to worry about anyone else's schedule. I slept when I was tired, ate when I was hungry and did what I wanted to do when I wanted to do it. 

I got some minis painted. I did a lot of writing on my Raven's Apprentice story (see my other blog). I didn't watch as many movies as I thought I would.

It was relaxing.

Of course, like all great vacations I was ready for it to end and things to get back to normal about a day before they actually did. :) 

Juno's back now. Vacation over and we're getting back into the rhythm of it all.

Mom is still, as far as I can tell, in good spirits. I'm calling her regularly, just to check in.

Oh, and it's June now... So, Happy Pride Month. 

Onward